Fun things about the weekend...

The "woof" movie & the "not niiiice" Cruella



Saturday mornings, pajamas & dinosaurs



Best friends & sisters ~ one in the same



Sundays & visits from MIMI! (not pictured, lots of stolen sugars & cuddles)



Celebrating 15 weeks!



Togetherness ~ what it's all about
Have a blessed week...Love, us

Fun things about the weekend...John's version

Playing in Mama's car & Pop Pop's truck



Hangin' w.Pop Pop ~ he keeps me gigglin' :)



Enjoyin' a lazy Sunday morning full of sunshine, IHOP pancakes, porchin' & walkin' in big shoes



Hangin' out w.Mama & the baby



Being a cuddle bug ALL day ~ Mama & Deddy soakin' me up like warm sunshine



Hope everyone was able to enjoy some beautiful sunshine this weekend. Have a blessed week!

Love (and of course dinosaur growls!) ~ John Tyson

Dear John,

Hey buddy ~ Mama here...

Haven't written you a letter in a while & feeling a sudden urge to do so. It's a lil' before 8 & I just put you to bed. Your Deddy's at Bible study so it was just us for after dinner, bath & bedtime tonight. It's not as easy when it's just us two, but I cherish it nonetheless. We cuddled on the couch some & watched your dog movie (101 dalmatians) before heading up for bath. For our time upstairs tonight, I had a moment & put in your Bedtime w.The Beatles CD.

After we'd dried off & said "night night" to the moon out the bathroom window - you said "night night" to all your faves on your picture board. The grandparents are easily your favorites to say "night night" to. Your were such joy tonight as I put on your diaper & lotion. You kept trying to eat your toes, which you thought was hysterical - then you tried to put them in my mouth so I would eat them too (which of course, I did) :) As I put the lotion on your legs you held them straight up & helped rub it in - you are too funny sometimes!

The CD was between songs as I sat down to rock you. Lo and behold, "In My Life" was the next track to play. As I'm looking at your silhouette there in my lap and thinking about the lyrics to that song, I felt the tears burning hot down my cheeks. I stroked your hair & nuzzled as close as I could while watching your lil' toes wiggling out the end of your blanket. At one point I felt your lil' body relax & you take the biggest sigh - I almost said aloud, "be still my heart". Your peace in my lap is a warmth in my heart that I cannot explain.

A lot of thoughts were running through my head while we were rocking. Since there was still a bit of light coming through your blinds I could easily peer around your room. I felt a wave of emotion as I held you a little closer thinking that it wouldn't be your room for very much longer. You may have a felt a slight sob from me as I was listening to that sweet lullaby playing, seeing your feet hanging out the end of the blanket & trying to imagine the tiny baby you were when we first brought you into that room - your room. Then I had another wave of emotion thinking that I made a BIG purchase for you today - your 1st big boy bed! I also got you some really cool dinosaur bedding that I hope you will love. But of course the nostalgia looking around at all the boat & nautical stuff was kinda overwhelming in that moment. I thought about the mobile w.the boats that used to hang over your crib & how much you loved to watch it go round & round. I have to laugh a lil' now thinking about the time I devastated myself by over-winding it & the music was silenced for a short time. That hurt my feelings so bad.

Speaking of hurt feelings - you've hurt mine a lot here lately. Not that you mean to, but you've been kind of a bear & very partial to your Deddy. I know it's your age & I know the sensitive feelings are probably a lot my hormones, but man - the heart's been aching a little. I feel like I'm giving you my best only to get the worst from you sometimes. The caveat of it all, which keeps me from letting it get me too down - you're so my child that it's uncanny. I know the small doses of heartache I feel now pale to the way I know I made my Mama feel sometimes growing up. To console me when I told her about my lil' hurt feelings, she said "well, look how you turned out" to which I replied, "yeah, but that took 30 years!" With each day & phase/change I see you go through, I only appreciate the sanctity of a mother's love more - there is nothing relenting or wavering about it. Not that it's easy, but it's like breathing - it's just what you do.

Moreover, for the heartache I feel sometimes, I also feel overwhelming joy and tears of happiness find their way into almost each & every day. Which is the bigger reason I wanted to write you. I wanted to tell you some of the many things you do that make me smile right now. So, I grabbed the laptop (and a blanket cause it's a lil' cool) & parked it on the back porch to work on my list :) In no particular order - you bring a smile to my face when:

you say my name ~ you sing "moon, moon stars" ~ you help me do the motions to "zacheus" (you're a great climber) ~ you say you want more milk & you go get it out of the fridge ~ you back pedal into the kitchen when unsavory characters come on your movies ~ you share apples w.me - but only if we're sitting side by side ~ you smile ~ you clap & say "Yayyy" ~ you run to my arms ~ you need kisses on both hands when the boo-boo is only on one ~ you love on Salem ~ you say, sometimes holler, "HAYYYY" to strangers & they're usually all too happy to greet & smile back at you ~ you growl like a dinosaur ~ you use your sweet voice & cock your head to ask for a "treat" after dinner ~ you put your clothes in the dirty clothes like a big boy - you're such a good helper ~ you say "night night" to everyone in your pictures ~ you hold my hand ~ you smile & say "hey" to the baby you think lives in my belly button ~ you don't know I'm watching the world through your eyes & nothing short of amazed ~ you stop & pause, listening for birds ~ you laugh your "I know I'm being a ham & they love it" laugh ~ you hold our hands to pray - I don't know who peeks most, you or us ~ you let me rock you & hold you close ~ you concentrate & show remarkable diligence to be so young ~ you exert your independence (while at times frustrating, it makes me so proud) ~ you sit & "read" your books ~ you sit down to color, announcing your color choices - white is for some reason, a favorite :) ~ you "explain" things to us - we don't understand half of what you say, but love to listen nonetheless ~you snuggle your giraffe & stretch out like a big boy when I lay you down (this evokes smiles & tears) ~ your spirit shines through - you are a mirror that shows God's love for us every day...

Well, it's getting kinda cool here on the porch - I see my breath as I'm typing. I know you won't read this any time soon, but it's certainly written for you. And one day when you do read all my ramblings, certain truths will still stand. I am incredibly proud of you & thank God for your presence in my life every day. You help me be the person I'm meant to be (you & your Deddy both). I learn so much from you about facets of life I didn't know existed before you. And I guess the biggest thing to leave you w.is no matter how we may disappoint, hurt or frustrate each other now or when your grown - know that my arms & heart will always have a place just for you, no matter what. I love you more than those "moon, moon stars" you love to sing about.

All my heart <3,>
Mama

~ In my life I love you more ~

All About Baby...week 12

Infusing a lil' guilt, my Mama asked me the other day if Baby Fish was going to get their own website. I laughed (was she serious?!) - when would I manage that? Oh yeah, in that 25th or 26th hour of my day! I told her, "No, don't think so!" Since I finally got page one done on my 2nd pregnancy scrapbook last night, the guilt started to creep in about Baby Fish not getting his/her own website. Therefore, I've since decided, they will get their own "All About Baby" posts from time to time over the next months and that should set the world right again, haha :) At this stage these All About Baby posts will be a lot about mama being pregnant since Baby Fish isn't really carrying such a large presence just yet.

I've finally started to feel better in the last week or so - a lot better, actually (heavens part, halelujahs ring out)! Feeling very thankful for that & I know my family is too. "What's that, Mama's actually fixing supper & trying to plan meals - thrilling :)."

Baby Fish had their 2nd Dr.'s Appt. on Tuesday. We were tickled b/c we were SUPPOSED to hear the lil' heartbeat. We were quickly defeated w.some growing concern when Dr. Flanagan failed to hear anything but my whopping heartbeat w.the lil' doppler. She asked the nurse to bring in the old ultrasound machine. She said they have a "portable" one to drag from room to room. So, more goop & she went searching. And there Baby Fish was and there that lil' heart was, pounding away....DEEP SIGH!! Seeing another picture so soon was kinda amazing - Baby Fish looked just like a real baby - with limbs, features, etc. A lil' sad we didn't get any sound effects, but thankful to get another peek so soon. She said everything looked great and we're thankful for that.

Before trying to find the heartbeat & taking a peek we spent quite some time talking w.Dr. Flanagan (she was the rock star who delivered John). She went over a lot of standard pregnancy stuff, but Seth also asked her some questions about what to expect this time w.delivery & options. She said they'll do a late ultrasound w.Baby Fish (I forget at what week) to see how big he/she is. If they're looking to be on track w.John or bigger we may plan to induce on/before my due date. Being that there was such bad tearing w.John, she also said I could "elect" to have a c-section. After pretty much hashing out that I've seen the worst w.that & you can't get worse than the worst, I feel pretty comfortable that if things stay on track, I will likely pass on the elective c-section. However, it will be exciting to think we get a "bonus" ultrasound that late in the game. This lil' booger's already set to have double the pics John had made :)

Sweet moment last night when Seth was at Bible study. John & I are on the living room floor watching his "animoooos" movie (Ice Age 3). I was laying back on his bean bag and asked him, "Buddy, do you know what Mama has in her belly?" He then proceeds to lift up my shirt & take a peek. I laughed & said, "There's a baby in there!" He then stuck his finger in my belly button (I guess thinking that was how to get to the baby) & giggled. I repeated myself a couple of times & he just smiled & put both hands on my belly, trying to push down. I said, "Be easy - the baby's too little for all that right now. When it gets bigger it will come out and you can play with it!" John then leaned over (prepare yourself - an "awe" moment coming up) and pressed his cheek to my belly & said, "Heyyy Babyyyy" in his sweet lil' voice. Oh, be still my heart...such a heartwarming moment :)

Talked to Seth some yesterday about Baby Fish's official soundtrack (didn't know babies needed official soundtracks, did ya?!). Well John's was most certainly Jason Falkner's "Bedtime w.The Beatles" album. From "Across the Universe" to "In My Life", I listened to this CD many times over before John was born and in his earliest days, I heard it time & time again as I would rock John to sleep or enjoy those quiet moments of trying to shut my own eyes while it peacefully played through the baby monitor. The familiar chords in those songs, especially those versions of them will forever put that "hot feeling" in my eyes right before the tears well up. It evokes a heart-warming ache for the lil' baby he was.

Well, thank goodness Mr. Falkner did a follow up album b/c I can not have my children sharing soundtracks & explained as much to Seth :). Bedtime w.the Beatles 2 will certainly be the 1st lullabies this sweet baby will have his/her sweet dreams to. Early favorites are definitely "Lucy in the Sky...", "Hey Jude" and "Here Comes the Sun", especially the latter. I've been listening to this while typing this post & I have to say it gives me those same warm flutters as the 1st one did while anticipating and dreaming of John.

Music's pretty sacred to me and while it may seem silly, I want my children to have songs to carry with them through their lives knowing they were "their songs" in their Mama's heart. Maybe one day when I'm gone, they'll get the same warm feeling I do as they recall hearing from me time & time again, "that song makes me think of you - it played over & over when (insert time, event, age, etc.)"

Sorry for the music tangent :) Baby Fish's next appt. is May 4th w.Dr. Martin - she's the one who got labor started w.John (lots of gushing water ring any bells?!). In looking at the calendar, I guess the next appt. will be the 1st week of June and that will be the BIG visit where we get to find out if we should be shopping blue or pink. I'm a lil' anxious to know, but I know in my heart I will be thrilled & surprised either way.

Please keep our growing family in your prayers, especially this littlest one. Pray that he/she will to continue to grow & develop. We are so thankful to be awaiting another one of God's miracles & it's still hard to believe we've got this addition to look forward to...

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun
and I say it's all right

Happy Easter!

Hosana in the highest!
The Lord is risen - the Lord is risen indeed!
Wishing everyone a blessed Easter ~ Love, The Fisher Family